Remembrances of Things Past
A poem of puns on computing and networking words, remembering when they meant something else.
Greenfield, S., "Remembrances of Things Past", RFC 1300, DOI 10.17487/RFC1300, February 1992, <https://www.rfc-editor.org/info/rfc1300>.
@misc{rfc1300,
series = {Request for Comments},
number = 1300,
howpublished = {RFC 1300},
publisher = {RFC Editor},
doi = {10.17487/RFC1300},
url = {https://www.rfc-editor.org/info/rfc1300},
author = {S. Greenfield},
title = {{Remembrances of Things Past}},
pagetotal = 4,
year = 1992,
month = feb,
} RFC text
Contents
Network Working Group S. Greenfield
Request for Comments: 1300 Ziff-Davis
February 1992
Remembrances of Things Past
Status of this Memo
This memo provides information for the Internet community. It does
not specify an Internet standard. Distribution of this memo is
unlimited.
Discussion
When Shannon was a river
and Turing was a car
When Banyan was a tree
and buses travelled far
dBase was where you ran to
after you hit the ball
Often we were ANSI
RISC aversive not at all
Windows were for looking out of
in a Tandem, two could take a spin
Bridges were for crossing
a frame was to keep pictures in
A semi-conductor was a maestro
not in the big time yet
A port you sought in a storm
fishermen used a net
Woody Guthrie sang of "My LAN"
WAN was a despairing mood
LATAs were for high places
menus featured food
If a cursor used four letter words
a sensor cut them out
The sight of a mouse in an office
was sure to raise a shout
Haloid perfected photocopying
and thereby made a hoard
Then came Japanese competition
and its "ox" was gored
Frequency was measured in cycles
Hertz referred to multiple pain
Modem was a harvesting command
for bringing in the grain
Modelling was at fashion shows
bauds were ladies of the night
Prompting was helping actors
contesting for resources, a fight
Walking and chewing gum concurrently
requires considerable skill
We called it multi-tasking
and by gosh we always will
We had no electronic calculators
just slide rules by Keuffel & Esser
I am still a true believer
Keufel & Esser war besser
Chips were used for gambling
von Neuman was a pup
Monte Carlo a place to visit
squaring the circle ... well, we gave up
A Sprint was less than 880
a relay was a team
Greene was just a color
breaking up AT&T a dream
Coherent was applied to speech
not a spectral line excited
Multi-media meant prose and song
and Noel Coward was knighted
Cerf was found at the beach
a Rose was a Rose was a Rose
Jobs were to look for
and Gates were to close
"2B" was an elementary school class
and "D" a failing grade
A router was a tool
a server was a maid
Lotus was a flower
adobe was a brick
Postscript was an afterthought
joy a popsicle stick
We called a plotter a CAD
a token ring a sham
A buffer was for buffing
a male goat was a ram
The best noise supressor was ... ssh
we knew little of egos and ids
For archival storage and encryption
we looked to the pyramids
Now in accordance with Greenfield's Law
in voice both loud and clear
Here's to exponential growth in memory
& operating speed next year.
--srg
Security Considerations
Security issues are not discussed in this memo.
Author's Address
Stanley R. Greenfield
Ziff-Davis
One Park Avenue
New York, NY 10016
EMail: 0004689513@mcimail.com
AI ELI5
On this page
§1A Poem in an RFC
RFC 1300 by Stanley R. Greenfield of Ziff-Davis, dated February 1992, is a poem under the heading "Discussion". Its status section says only that it provides information and does not specify an Internet standard.
The poem is a long run of two-line contrasts. It looks back to a time when technical words had other meanings, and it is signed "--srg".
This is a poem filed in a collection of technical papers. It has no rules in it, just rhymes.
§2The Wordplay
Every couplet swaps a modern term for an older sense. A router was a tool and a server was a maid. Windows were for looking out of, bridges were for crossing, and a frame was for keeping pictures in. A buffer was for buffing, and a plotter was called a CAD.
The poem opens with "When Shannon was a river and Turing was a car" and keeps going through names, companies and gadgets of the period, including Banyan, dBase, Tandem, Lotus, adobe and Keuffel & Esser slide rules.
Each pair of lines says, "Back then this word meant something silly and ordinary." Like when a mouse was only an animal in the office.
§3The Closing Toast
The last lines turn to the future. "In accordance with Greenfield's Law", the poem toasts "exponential growth in memory and operating speed next year." The Security Considerations section says security issues are not discussed in the memo.
The poem ends by wishing for computers that get bigger and faster every year.